Book Review: Narrow Dog To Carcassonne.

Probably one of the worst books I have ever read.

English canals are in many parts extremely narrow and subsequently so are the boats which travel them. This book is about an old couple who decide to take their narrow boat across the channel to France and travel down the country. Accompanying them is their dog Jim. Jim is a Whippet and not knowing much about this particular breed I Googled 'Whippet Temperament". It came up with Affectionate, Gentle, Intelligent, Friendly, Lively. After hearing all about Jim the Whippet's exploits (seriously that's all the writer fucking talks about) I emailed Google telling them their description was inaccurate and requested that they change it to "Cunt of a thing". I am no way a dog hater but this guy was a little prick.

I love travel books. When people are travelling they are at their happiest, they are carefree and excited about experiencing new things. Not this old bastard. The whole trip he just complains. "Oh this place smells." "Oh my boat's broken." "Oh I'm a dick." ...and so on.

The style in which the book is written is painful. The writer doesn't use quotation marks, the grammar is atrocious, sometimes to the point of not being able to understand what the hell is going on. hey we all make grammatical mistakes but what were the editors and shit up to?

I would rather have listened to an audio book of the Koran played backwards, sitting in a snow storm in a backwards g-string.

I bothered to review this book not because I am a hater but because if I can stop one person who was potentially going to read this from reading it. Then I have changed the world.


I did feel sorry for the guy when I saw this however: Staffordshire author sees famous narrowboat go up in flames

At least he can't write any more shit books about his boat.

0.3/5