Things that annoy me about the household toaster

 

The toaster is a mandatory kitchen appliance that fulfills one of the most simple tasks - to turn bread in to toast. Bread is one of the most common consumer foods in western society which therefore imply that an appliance used for the sole purpose of cooking this food would be running at full potential - wrong. We have all at one time or another unintentionally worn a smile of over-cooked toast specs due to the unpredictable nature of the toaster. The toaster takes it upon itself to decide that we wanted our toast to come out with a kenyan tan, despite having the setting on what we had assumed was a Eva Mendes glow. The wise ones amongst us would dispose of the burnt bread and frustratingly start the process again, with noone to blame but the toaster.

Why has this not been rectified? Surely a universal toaster setting should be implicated with slighty different shades of brown being the wise measure. There should also be a very clear setting that suits the breads of the vogels variety, so that the usually satisfying occurance of toast popping is not watered down by the requirement of a second run for the 'toast' on the burners. I don't know who is to answer for this but I hope that this can inspire somebody out there to strive to rectify this issue.